If you have spent time in Pediatric therapy waiting rooms getting services for your kids with Autism, you have inadvertently come across these people at one time or another. In fact, you may very well be one or a combo of these people. Personally, I have been been several of these at one time or another (4, 5 and 9 in particular). I drafted this in my head this past summer after spending several hours a day in waiting rooms!
1. The TMI’er- They ensure that everyone knows what is up with their child. Before you part ways, you will have a strong understanding of their child’s current bowel issues ( how often they go, what it looks like etc), food preferences and their child’s current diagnoses.
2. The Newb – They are new to this scene after having their child age out of in-home early intervention programs. They often have the “deer in headlights” look in their eyes. Once they have been there awhile, they will morph into another type.
3. The Acronymer – These people speak in abbreviations “OT, SLP, PT, ABA, COMT etc.” They sometimes use 2-3 Acronyms in one sentence acronyms and are oblivious to the glazed look that comes into your eyes midway into the conversation. They have read a lot books and remain under the illusion that you have too. It is best to just nod your head as if in agreement and avoid clarification.
4. The Been There/Done that – They are loosely related to the Acronymer but will carry an air of superiority. They like to think that they are the Autismest person of all time and maybe they are – if only you could understand what they are talking about. They will often strike up a conversation with the Newb so they can impart their wisdom.
5.The I Cannot Lose Controller – These are the ones that bring all their kids and keep them on a short leash in the event they wreak havoc on the waiting room. They will sometimes look with disdain at the kids who ARE wreaking havoc in the waiting room and will not allow their kids to join them. This will result in their kids getting upset and causing a scene – this will generally elicit a eye roll of “Do you see what I have to put up with?”.
6. The Groomed Professional- they often look a little out of place in the waiting room amongst the jeans and Ugg boots. They are not the regular chauffeur for their child but are usually happy to be there and see what their child does. They are even happier when it is time for them to go back to work to make the money that pays for the therapies.
7. The Earth Mother – They know all staff, parents and kids and will address them all individually, by name, and remember what was going on with them the week before. Their own child is ignored and is likely to go tip the bookcase over to get attention.
8. The Drama King/Queen– Similar to the Been There/Done That with an exception, they make a grand entrance that no one can ignore. They will yell at their kids without hesitation and yell at yours if they see fit. You always know what is going on with them because they are LOUD in relating their tales of woe.
9. The Nobody Talk To Me– This person is the one sitting in the corner with a book or electronic device. They rarely make eye contact and just want to be left alone. Do not try and make small talk. Seriously, just leave them alone.
10. The Others This includes babysitters, nannies and grandparents. They are hoping that their charge avoids a meltdown and will do whatever it takes to keep them happy. They sometimes have siblings with them who wreak havoc in the waiting room and they will attempt to maintain control but the kids don’t listen to them, so it’s a half-hearted attempt. They clean up the mess inflicted during the scheduled therapy time prior to leaving.
Is anyone missing?
Leave a Reply